#182: Visibility As Generosity: Rethinking Photos, Aging, And Confidence With Photographer Kristen Vallejo

What's in this episode

If you've ever hidden in the back of a family photo, skipped a headshot session, or cringed when you saw a candid picture of yourself, this episode is for you. I sat down with Kristen Vallejo, a portrait and branding photographer based in upstate New York, who has made it her mission to help women feel comfortable and confident being seen. In this conversation, we unpack why so many of us (especially women navigating midlife) have such a complicated relationship with being photographed. We talk about the role social media has played in making us feel like every picture has to be perfect, why menopause can make it even harder to recognize yourself in photos, and how we can start to shift that. One of the most powerful reframes Kristen shares is this: visibility is generosity. When you hide from the camera, you're also withholding yourself ( your gifts, your presence, your relatability) from the people who need to see you. That hit me in a deep way, and I think it will for you too. We also talk about body diversity and representation, why photographers aren't looking at you with the critical lens you're using on yourself, and some practical tips to make any photo session feel less li